About Nicole Crump, LCSW-R

My Journey: Understanding the Power of Connection

The sudden death of my father from a massive heart attack when I was 16 years old deeply influenced my emotional blueprint. Experiencing a loss that big, that young, my subconscious mind went into overdrive, protecting me from emotions I wasn't equipped to handle. In that moment, the world felt scary and uncertain, and I immediately went into survival mode. Unknowingly, I began to disassociate because the pain and grief were overwhelming.

Years later, in my clinical work, I discovered attachment therapy, which had a profound impact on my personal life. I realized that being disconnected from my feelings was contributing to my anxiety and pervasive loneliness. I saw that the emotional wall I’d built to protect myself was also preventing me from achieving genuine connection in all my relationships. I feared that finding my own voice and doing the necessary inner work would push people away, because they were not used to the real me. In truth, it was not knowing the “real me” and my anxiety that left me immobilized. I did not just distrust others; I did not trust me because of the years of betraying myself.

“I had a huge, paradoxical fear of being seen, even though I consciously craved it. The deeper truth was this: I was terrified of learning who I was outside of the helper role.”

My inner world was chaotic. Hiding from myself and burying my emotions had become a painful yet familiar default. I felt angry, hurt, and anxious because I was truly invisible; even to myself!

The pain of losing my father was unbearable, and emotionally disconnecting was the only way I knew how to survive. But in surviving that loss, I lost myself.

My journey through emotional rebuilding wasn't easy, but it led to the realization that true connection starts with radical self-acceptance. That hard won wisdom; that self-love is the foundation of all healthy bonds is the bedrock of my therapeutic approach.